NOT ONLY IS IT SUPER SATURDAY BUT IT’S ALSO ST. PADDY’S EVE!
CRU’S TURNTABLE MASTER, DJ CHRIS AND KARAOKE KING, DJ ZEUS WILL BE DOING WHAT THEY DO BEST IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING THE FINAL WHISTLES. SO PLAN TO JOIN THEM FOR A LITTLE OR A LONG TIME! THE PARTY CONTINUE AS LONG AS THERE’S ENOUGH REVELLERS TO JUSTIFY IT!
GRAB YOUR GREENEST OUTFIT, SOME GLITTER SHAMROCKS AND MAKE SURE YOUR PLANS INCLUDE HANGING OUT AT THE CRU AFTER THE GAMES! TELL YOUR FRIENDS OR BETTER STILL, BRING THEM ALONG.
Review of Six Nations Round 4
Well, nobody thought we would be here… it’s the last weekend of Six Nations 2024 action and Ireland haven’t already wrapped up the trophy in a nice green ribbon. And why is that? Well last week, in Round 4, the rugby world as we know it was turned on it’s head. It all kicked off with the Italians starting Round 4 as they had finished Round 3 (with the ball falling off the tee mid-kick). Fortunately everyone had done a thorough law review in the weeks since Round 3 and were now in a position to let play calmly resume giving Italy a vital 3 points which they were unnecessarily greedy with and went on to beat the stunned Scots by a massive 2 points.
Then, as the Irish, wryly smiling in Scotland’s direction while simultaneously shaking their head in disbelief at the Italians (whom they had blanked in Dublin earlier in the competition), their multitasking must’ve got the better of them, and they forgot how to tackle, catch, pass and hold the ball. This gave the English the opportunity to score several tries with a display of actual rugby, the likes of which England fans can scarcely remember. It was a display stunned both teams as the Irish were handed their first defeat since the World Cup Quarter-Final, albeit by a single point. England are still scratching their collective noggins trying to figure out whether that was a once-off or was in fact a repeatable performance. Time will tell.
Meanwhile, Wales were amazing… for 50 minutes… at which point France remembered why, not long ago, they were once considered one of the best teams in the world… second to Ireland who had just crumbled. The massively statured France on the other hand did the most un-French thing possible… they did not crumble.
And that is why we find ourselves rolling into Round 5 with lots still to play for!
All games this week take place on Saturday… hence the name Super Saturday… c’mon Wally, keep up!
Game 1 – Wales v Italy (KO 10:15am) ~ AKA The Battle for the Wooden Spoon
The Six Nations of 2022 will forever haunt the Welsh, as Italy picked up their first and only win of that (and countless other) Six Nations championships right in the dragon’s lair in Cardiff. However, that will pale into insignificance if the Italians were to repeat that feat and in doing so hand the Welsh the wooden spoon. As it stands, Italy are in the driving seat. Having looked like a half decent side for much of the Six Nations so far (the Ireland game excepted) Italy are sitting 5th in the table. 4 points behind them are the Welsh, who must be the strongest team in the championship as they sit at the bottom of the table, holding everyone else up. Remarkably, if the Italians win with a bonus point, they could actually end up third if neither France nor Scotland pick up a bonus point in either of their games. To avoid having to decorate their daffodils with “wooden spoon” stems, the Welsh need to beat the Italians by more than 7 points (denying the Italians a losing bonus point) but also making sure the Italians don’t score 4 or more tries (denying them a try bonus point). Basically, Italian bonus point(s) equals a P45 (the Welsh equivalent of a Record of Employment (ROE)) for Mr. Gatland.
Game 2 – Ireland v Scotland (KO 12:45pm) ~ AKA Party People or Party Poopers?
Scotland is in the enviable position of having the potential to be major Party Poopers. They could theoretically go top of the Six Nations championship table if they manage to beat Ireland by 76 points and deny them any bonus points. A more likely, but still unlikely (since it hasn’t happened since 2001), scenario would be for Scotland to beat Ireland by more than 7 points and deny them a bonus point, leaving the Six Nations title within the flailing grasps of England. I doubt that, even if a Scotland win were possible, Scotland would ever stoop so low as to do the English a favour. So in conclusion, on the eve of St. Patrick’s Day, at home in Dublin, Ireland will be crowned Six Nations Champions but not, as everyone predicted, back-to-back Grand Slam Winners. I can’t wait to see how Netflix spins this in 6 months!
Game 3 – France v England (KO 4:00pm) ~ AKA What’s the Point or (as the French would say) Qu’est ce que Dupont?
As far as titles are concerned, this game will probably be meaningless before it kicks off. However, with only 1 point separating the two teams, it would seem that this is indeed a battle for “numéro deux”! (Cue Austin Powers type jokes) The French have looked less than impressive playing at home in France away from their usual Stade France abode (which is under renovations ahead of this Summer’s Olympic Games). Ireland subjected France to a record defeat in Marseille and Italy snatched a tie from the jaws of victory in Lille, so what will the English lions expect in Lyon? Can France continue the momentum from the last 30 minutes of the Welsh game? Can England play rugby… real, running rugby… real, running, try-scoring rugby… at any point during the 80 minutes? Of course, if Scotland were to do them a favour, England would need a bonus point win over France to see them lift the Six Nations Cup. #notgoingtohappen #stopdreaming
All this excitement and more awaits Six Nations fans who will not want to hear the final whistle this weekend as that will signal the end of what has been a joyous couple of months of incredible rugby. Fortunately, it’s only a two-week wait until we start all over again with the Women’s Six Nations, so thankfully our disappointment will be short-lived.
So, drag your bestie down to the club for all the fun… and then some! If it’s anything like last weekend, the games will be as unpredictable as Ray Carby’s hands (alright, they’re not unpredictable… he’s going to drop the ball) and the libations will go down easier than Peter Walker’s arm in an arm wrestle… against a child.
BRING CASH FOR FOOD PURCHASE THROUGHOUT THE DAY
